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Topic: Horizon story... girly version
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Catwoman
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EVERY ONE ADD A SENTANCE!
one hot sunny day, in the land of lancashire ice queen and XXBitch were filing their well manicured nails when........
[ May 16, 2003, 12:18: Message edited by: Cat Woman ]
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Bronx 
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both of them were thinking about how much they would like Bronx's cock
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Catwoman
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when catwoman came along with her little kitty, Muffins and.........
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Bronx
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farted ... "woops" it smelt like ...
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Catwoman
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and then she put a bag over bronx's head coz he hadn't taken a facial! ice queen then....
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SirLardsAlot
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.. came to American with Amanda and they fell madly in love with Steve.
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Posts: 5087 (0.84 per day) | From: Poopland | Registered: Oct 2002 (6034 days)
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WaLdO
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Cause you know girls just love gay men. Its like a best friend for them.
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Posts: 2987 (0.48 per day) | From: OkiE PridE | Registered: May 2002 (6187 days)
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DaRk QuEen
In Your Dreams
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so then DaRk_Queen took out her magical wand and added 10% knowledge upon everyone here...She knew that would not be enough but with people like these she couldn't not give them a O.D. with it. So once they have found there new found knowledge.......
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"Oh What A Tangled Web We Weave,
When One First Pratices To Deceive"
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Bronx
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they learnt how to spell their ...
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Ice Queen
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names. Although this only worked on the girls and those dumb ass guys called Bronx, SirLardsAlot and Waldo became the slaves of Ice Queen, Fallen Angel and Bitch xx, so........
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We are all born for love. It is the principle of my existence,
and its only end.
I feel it when I when I sorrow most:
It is better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
Seduce my mind and you can have my body
Find my soul and I'm yours forever
Love is like war,
Easy to begin but hard to end.
Love is like a rumor,
Everyone talks about it,
But no one truly knows.
Posts: 1310 (0.22 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Feb 2003 (5938 days)
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WaLdO
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WaLdO led a revolution to free the men from the insane crazy bitches who thought they had power. SirLardsAlot was wounded critically but Bronx and WaLdO were able to escape and then they raped and pilaged the woman towns!..
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Posts: 2987 (0.48 per day) | From: OkiE PridE | Registered: May 2002 (6187 days)
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Bronx
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... and 9 months later a race of ubermenschen were born, the spawn of WaLdO and Bronx, they were to be the forefathers of a new age that was to dawn on civilisation ...
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Posts: 9347 (1.48 per day) | From: Gloucestershire, England | Registered: Feb 2002 (6300 days)
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SirLardsAlot
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... Then Steve came over and asked what was happeneing and asked if he survived when Waldo and Bronx saved him ..
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WaLdO
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WaLdO and Bronx look over at Steve, but then realized he had no testicles so he couldn't breed. They both let out a sigh of relief and then WaLdO and Bronx ...
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SirLardsAlot
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... Each donated a testicle to Steve ...
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WaLdO
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Only to realize that wow he doesnt have a penis either..
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Posts: 2987 (0.48 per day) | From: OkiE PridE | Registered: May 2002 (6187 days)
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2-D..
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
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so they made one out of sticky back plastic and a straw
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*Coming soon: Something so awesome to look at it will make your eyeballs explode*
Posts: 6460 (0.98 per day) | From: Hadleys Hope | Registered: Jun 2001 (6539 days)
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Catwoman
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'here's one i made earlier' and god gives steve the penis his mother accidently bit off at birth... after mistaking it for his umbilical cord and then christening steve, stephanie..... and yonder in walks catwoman and bitch.... who have been so busy partying that.......
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Posts: 909 (0.14 per day) | From: burnley....uk | Registered: Mar 2002 (6269 days)
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Angel
Naughty But Nice
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bitch falls madley in love with waldo and they both runaway together and .....
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To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things.
Posts: 216 (0.03 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Dec 2002 (5989 days)
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Catwoman
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.....too have millions and trillions of babies... meanwhile in the land of nod amanda has been flirting with the evil, corrupt captain Arkan, unbeknown to her he is planning to kidnap her and use her in his master plan too..........
[ May 19, 2003, 13:22: Message edited by: Cat Woman ]
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Angel
Naughty But Nice
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get the poor sirlardsalot a girlfriend. Meanwhile waldo and bitch returned with their love child .....
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To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things.
Posts: 216 (0.03 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Dec 2002 (5989 days)
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WaLdO
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ReDeeMeR , he was a young stout boy, who looked just like the evil king...
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Posts: 2987 (0.48 per day) | From: OkiE PridE | Registered: May 2002 (6187 days)
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SirLardsAlot
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.. Theoden, who then became good and then proceded to defeat the Urah-Kais (sp?) at Helms Deep, along with the help of the Legolas, Aragorn, Gimli, Gandalf the White, and the Elves of Rohan ....
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WaLdO
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After all that stuff happened.. he was murdered by his mothers lover , Bronx...
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Catwoman
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with an antique pitch fork.... WAlDO then...........
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WaLdO
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fell asleep cause he was dog tired...
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Catwoman
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(he had been up all nite with bitch) meanwile malibu barbie and arkan were.....
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WaLdO
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Shagging in a Shaggin Wagon down by the river , WaLdO awoke after having a night of pure sex. He doesn't remember much cause he was drunk and took some ecstacy ...
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Bronx
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..playing 'lets find malibu barbie' ... *schlop* ... "found you, oh barbie, you smell of shit ... but then you were up my ass!!" as arkan went to lick barbie clean ...
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Bronx
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Mine was better... lol
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Catwoman
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a barbie camper truck ran him over...... meanwhile....
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WaLdO
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In the woods , WaLdO gets sick and tired of the same ol pussy from Bitch... so he calls up Ice Queen for a booty call...
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Catwoman
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Ice queen refused him and sent him packing to little amanda.... so waldo and amanda were having a quickie behind the back of the bike sheds when........
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Angel
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sirlardsalot came walking by, he saw waldo with his girl and told him, that if he went near his girl again he would beat the shit out of him, so waldo walked away and.......
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To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things.
Posts: 216 (0.03 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Dec 2002 (5989 days)
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Bronx
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Bronx came in ... everyone fell to their knees
"Oh, blessed be, it is none other than our dear lord and savior Michael 'the great' P Arogant- el-Bastardo"
"Hommmayaaahamma, Praise our lord Bronx"
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Ice Queen
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phoned Ice Queen again, who said yes! yes! yes! (Oh no, that comes later............) They were getting cosy on the sofa when.........
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We are all born for love. It is the principle of my existence,
and its only end.
I feel it when I when I sorrow most:
It is better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
Seduce my mind and you can have my body
Find my soul and I'm yours forever
Love is like war,
Easy to begin but hard to end.
Love is like a rumor,
Everyone talks about it,
But no one truly knows.
Posts: 1310 (0.22 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Feb 2003 (5938 days)
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SirLardsAlot
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(I'm ingnoring Mike's post)
... all of a sudden, Steve kicks down the door and walks in with an sawed-off shotgun, and held Chris and IQ hostage. The phone rang, and Steve picked it up. It was Cat Woman, so Steve said in a deep voice "If you ever call here again, I will come to your house and slaughter you." He then hung up the phone.
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WaLdO
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Well being the smart girl CatWoman is, she comes walking over, and steve thinks about slaughtering her, but then thinks.. ahh payback, Ill have sex w/ her since amanda fucked waldo, so Steve and Cat are...
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SirLardsAlot
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...not together, they are still just friends. Steve never leaves an innocent woman ...
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Posts: 5087 (0.84 per day) | From: Poopland | Registered: Oct 2002 (6034 days)
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Catwoman
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until catwoman decides that anyman who refuses such a sex goddess must be not very well developed in the downstairs department and could never handle the cat and is shamefully frightened of her telling his big* ahem i mean small..... secrets to the rest of the horizon team.....
anyway.......
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SirLardsAlot
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...Outraed by this, Steve outs his shotgun to CatWoman's head, and tells her to appologize becuase he counts to 10.
1
2
3
4
5
..
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Posts: 5087 (0.84 per day) | From: Poopland | Registered: Oct 2002 (6034 days)
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Ice Queen
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She's so stubborn that she doesn't apologise, so he pulls the trigger and there's no Cat Woman. IQ then comes round and kisses Steve on the cheek and says ..................
[ May 25, 2003, 07:00: Message edited by: Ice Queen ]
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We are all born for love. It is the principle of my existence,
and its only end.
I feel it when I when I sorrow most:
It is better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
Seduce my mind and you can have my body
Find my soul and I'm yours forever
Love is like war,
Easy to begin but hard to end.
Love is like a rumor,
Everyone talks about it,
But no one truly knows.
Posts: 1310 (0.22 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Feb 2003 (5938 days)
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WaLdO
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*in a sweet assuring voice * You mother fucker. Payback is a bitch. Im going to rip your balls off and shove them in your mouth, Then that little pecker of yours is going to get chopped off and its going to be stuck in your ass . So she then calls...
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Posts: 2987 (0.48 per day) | From: OkiE PridE | Registered: May 2002 (6187 days)
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DaRk QuEen
In Your Dreams
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Bronx in to do the job..he comes and looks down at steve's "package" and starts laughing...soon he was laughing so hard tears started coming down his face and he lost his balance...laughing and laughing...rolling on the floor laughing....Steve's face is red as he puts his "package" away...Bronx gets rushed to the hospital cuz he can't stop laughing....Ice Queen and Cat women try to console Steve but it is no use....he grabs Cat women and takes off to......
( Sorry Steve, couldn't help it ![[Razz]](tongue.gif) )
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"Oh What A Tangled Web We Weave,
When One First Pratices To Deceive"
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WaLdO
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A remote cave and bangs her bow-legged and then he tells her when he is done
"Its not the size that matters, its what you do with it."
Then Cat Laughs and says If you wouldnt have used your fist it wouldnt have felt as good.
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Posts: 2987 (0.48 per day) | From: OkiE PridE | Registered: May 2002 (6187 days)
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SirLardsAlot
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... Then Steve yell's "JIHAD!!" and detonates the bomb strapped to his chest...
(Oh, and dont worry Tracey)
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Ice Queen
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and that's Cat woman finally gone. The IQ and FA find that Steve is still alive by a hairs breath and come to his rescue. Then Ice Queen .............
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We are all born for love. It is the principle of my existence,
and its only end.
I feel it when I when I sorrow most:
It is better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
Seduce my mind and you can have my body
Find my soul and I'm yours forever
Love is like war,
Easy to begin but hard to end.
Love is like a rumor,
Everyone talks about it,
But no one truly knows.
Posts: 1310 (0.22 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Feb 2003 (5938 days)
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WaLdO
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Jumps up and Stomps on steve's chest. Exploding his jihad guts everywhere..
so then Iq ....
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SirLardsAlot
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....Takes Steve's Jihad-ed body parts and puts them together with some sort of machine to make Stevebot. Stevebot is ultracool with a rocketlauncher for one hand and a machine gun for the other hand...
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WaLdO
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{steve your getting a bit crazyt}
WaLdO goes to Dark Queen and bangs her a few times...
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DaRk QuEen
In Your Dreams
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in his dreams...cuz DaRk_Queen don't sexually socialize with people at horizon lands...meanwhile back at the pub...She orders a beer and plays a song.....
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"Oh What A Tangled Web We Weave,
When One First Pratices To Deceive"
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charmed
Sweet and Innocent
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called love is in the air when Steve and Amanda walk in at different times. They look at each other and say..........
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SirLardsAlot
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... "Wait, tehre is no more Steve, just Stevebot." ...
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WaLdO
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SteveBot walks over to Amanda and says... Im always hard baby. THESE are brass bollocks!
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Bronx
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... brass they may be, full of blanks. Bronx walks in and throws a bucket of water over Stevebot, laughing heartily while all of Stevebots electronics are shorted out causing massive system failure. Stevebot, now worth no more than junk is removed to the trash out back.
Happy in his work, Bronx orders a pint of beer, nodding his head to DQ’s song when …
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Posts: 9347 (1.48 per day) | From: Gloucestershire, England | Registered: Feb 2002 (6300 days)
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WaLdO
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WaLdO walks in... Orders a pint himself and takes a seat next to Bronx...
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Shagi_Dawg
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dawg walks in not sure well the hell he is but grabs a beer and sits beside waldo..
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Catwoman
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dawg accidently spills his pint onto catwoman who has been asleep(having nightmares about being blown away by IQ) in the cornor of the horizon bar, drunkly she chuckles to herself whilst humming the tune for *i've got a lovely bunch of coconuts* in walks ice queen with yet another fella on her arm, low and behold she's only the horizon village bicycle..... Arkan then strolls in with his ultra cool shades and orders.....
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Posts: 909 (0.14 per day) | From: burnley....uk | Registered: Mar 2002 (6269 days)
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Ice Queen
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a drink called between the sheets and walks over to Cat Woman to show her his ..............
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We are all born for love. It is the principle of my existence,
and its only end.
I feel it when I when I sorrow most:
It is better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
Seduce my mind and you can have my body
Find my soul and I'm yours forever
Love is like war,
Easy to begin but hard to end.
Love is like a rumor,
Everyone talks about it,
But no one truly knows.
Posts: 1310 (0.22 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Feb 2003 (5938 days)
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Bronx
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... warty buttocks ...
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SirLardsAlot
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..which Cat Woman proceeds to lick ...
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DaRk QuEen
In Your Dreams
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and DaRk_Queen kicks the nasty ass out of her bar....(yes she bought the bar and owns it)
meanwhile she goes and starts dancing and soon everyone is up dancing around and being merry...when all of the sudden....
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"Oh What A Tangled Web We Weave,
When One First Pratices To Deceive"
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WaLdO
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The nasty whore walks in and yells at Dark Queen. so WaLdO and Bronx the Bouncers throw her ass back ....
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Catwoman
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catwoman... then resorts to taking over the world..... first she powers up a nuclear misile and launches it at ice queen, blowing off her slut of a head replying 'fuck i didn't expect that!' as ice queen transforms into her original form of a pig with three heads and green tenticles..... catwoman pinches herself to make sure she isn't dreaming.... amanda then enters the room crying 'where's my mummy!'...... and continues to kick the shit out of cat for blowing her mummy all the way to mars.... meanwhile DQ is sat in the horizon bar when in walks........
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Bronx
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... Bronx comes out of shock and holds his glass upright, as it was tipping onto his crotch. "Shit" ... Bronx then dives for the shotgun, grabbing the barrel ... both barrels are dscharged together away from the intended taget. Removing the weapon and proceding to crack the skull open of her boyfreind with the butt.
As the smoke clears someone starts to cry, it was clear that Arkan took both hots to the stomach and was slumped against the wall holding his own inards in ... a steady pool of blood forming underneath, the colour and life draining from his face.
SOmeone runs off to phone and ambulance when ...
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Posts: 9347 (1.48 per day) | From: Gloucestershire, England | Registered: Feb 2002 (6300 days)
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Catwoman
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in strolls hellsatan.......
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Posts: 909 (0.14 per day) | From: burnley....uk | Registered: Mar 2002 (6269 days)
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Arkan
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bronx slaps his head, realising that he hadnt killed arkan, he was just suffering from the effects of the shots, vodka doubles....upon realising his mistake, bronx sighs, and recocks his shotgun, is mid way thru re-aiming, when, in an ironic twist of fate, the ambulance arrives but it is unable to stop because gbotto and his pre-adolscencent squad600 groupies sabotaged its brakes. Anyway, it runs into bronx and then into a brick wall. Due to the magnitute of the collision, bronx's body is entirly liquified, hereby ruling out any future reconstruction of any type. Also DNA tests confirmed conclusivly that it was bronx's blood and not an imposter.
Meanwhile......
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"All This fucking self knowledge, where the fuck has it got me?" - Tony Soprano
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for all other enquiries, visit my Arkans Fan Center
Posts: 10646 (1.62 per day) | From: London Calling | Registered: May 2001 (6563 days)
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Catwoman
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at bronx's funeral.... xxBITCHxx mourns the loss of her lover, before the whole squad group head off to Bronx's house for the wake....... on the way there somebody trips over.......
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Posts: 909 (0.14 per day) | From: burnley....uk | Registered: Mar 2002 (6269 days)
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Bronx
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… an out stretched foot, it was Bronx himself ... all that Bronx knew is that he was contacted a couple of days ago by a clone of himself sent back in time, that was present in the bar at the time, while the other Bronx was at home getting some rest.
But back at DQ’s pub …
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Posts: 9347 (1.48 per day) | From: Gloucestershire, England | Registered: Feb 2002 (6300 days)
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Ice Queen
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the real Ice Queen emerges and brings out all her fucking arsenal and prceeds to anihilate Cat Woman cos she's a pussy loving HONEY MONSTER and we don't like BIG FAT BULLIES in the bar. IQ walks over to Arkan and Beat him to a pulp. Then grabs hold of ..............
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We are all born for love. It is the principle of my existence,
and its only end.
I feel it when I when I sorrow most:
It is better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
Seduce my mind and you can have my body
Find my soul and I'm yours forever
Love is like war,
Easy to begin but hard to end.
Love is like a rumor,
Everyone talks about it,
But no one truly knows.
Posts: 1310 (0.22 per day) | From: Lancashire | Registered: Feb 2003 (5938 days)
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SirLardsAlot
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Then Steve comes back to life ...
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Posts: 5087 (0.84 per day) | From: Poopland | Registered: Oct 2002 (6034 days)
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Shagi_Dawg
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then dawg smashes a pool stick over steves head and...
Posts: 988 (0.15 per day) | From: Winnipeg,MB | Registered: Mar 2002 (6248 days)
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SirLardsAlot
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Steve blocks it with his awsome ninja-like reflexes ...
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Posts: 5087 (0.84 per day) | From: Poopland | Registered: Oct 2002 (6034 days)
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Shagi_Dawg
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then dawg says ahh i worthy apponent....dawg moves into a fighting postion and dashes towards steve knocking him to teh ground...
Posts: 988 (0.15 per day) | From: Winnipeg,MB | Registered: Mar 2002 (6248 days)
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